Day 375 – Now is the time to PANIC!

So… I have 37 days until my half marathon! Yep, just 5 weeks! Can you feel my panic, yet? I am freaking OUT! On July 10th, I ran 10 miles. The next day, my knee was killing me, so I didn’t run again for a WEEK – a whole freakin’ week!! Since then, I’ve been getting back to it, but the longest I’ve gone is 6 miles. I’m trying to build back up without aggravating my knee, so I’m doing lots of cross-training (like, once a week). I’m also keeping my mileage lower and trying to listen to my body. That scares the CRAP out of me! Based on my original training plan, I should be running 38 miles this week – including a 12 mile long run. I’m actually going to hit about 20, and that’s only if I manage my full 8 mile long run on Sunday. I’ve switched over to Higdon’s Half Marathon training plan, and that puts me right where I should be… IF I finish this week without any issues and am able to progress on to next week.

I really just don’t feel like I’ve been running enough to be ready in time, and I hate that my knee keeps locking up. I never know when it will happen, and I haven’t figured out how to fix it. I’ll wake up one morning after a run (anything beyond 5 miles has the potential to upset it), and my right knee won’t bend right. It doesn’t really “hurt;” it just feels stuck – like it needs to pop, but trying to pop it makes it feel like the whole thing might shatter or explode. It will be hard to go up and down steps, and I’ll only be able to run with a severe limp (which causes 18 billion other pains, so I don’t do it). Eventually, it will pop – sometimes once, sometimes several times in a row, and then it feels completely normal again. I have learned that the weight of a roller blade, combined with the kicking motion of skating, will sometimes get it to pop. That’s why I’ve been doing so much skating for cross training. Unfortunately, the skating rink is 90 minutes away. With my schedule (teachers go back Aug 8th!), I don’t see myself skating anymore this summer. So… here’s to hoping my knee doesn’t freak out! If I can move forward with training from here, I’ll be okay – I think.

Apparently, keeping things under control on this last vacation paid off! I weighed in this morning, and was pleasantly surprised:

48 Scale July29 157.5 lbs

This puts me down 0.7 lbs from last week and my lowest weight yet!

I’m SO ready to go back to steady (no matter how slow) weight LOSS. This actually makes 6 weeks in a row that my weight has gone down (if only a smidge).

Day 375

My eating has been on-track, too!

Day 374 – Keep on keepin’ on

This last vacation went pretty well. I certainly indulged, but I kept running and am trying to bring it back under control…again. I think it helped that we stayed really active, too. We went to a trampoline park? room? place on Friday. It was SO much fun! I wasn’t brave enough to attempt any flip (I may be healthier, but I’m still over 30!), but I did do the jump thing where you land on you butt and then bounce back up to your feet. I felt like a kid again (well, almost – jumping on a trampoline really works the muscles in your feet, and apparently, mine aren’t as strong as they used to be!).

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Hubby got more than a dozen pics of me and not a single one came out clear! I never stopped moving, so this is actually the LEAST blurry of my pics.

On Saturday we went to Cedar Point. I haven’t been there since I was a kid, and now my own kid is old enough to start enjoying roller coasters! He isn’t quite tall enough to ride the most popular coasters, but he loved riding the mid-level ones! When I asked him what his favorite part of the park was, he said raft ride through the canyon and the log flume were the best. I suspect it might have something to do with getting wet in the 100 degree heat. At one point, I was in line for a coaster and saw a sign listing the height and weight limitations of the ride. I had a moment of panic and started to consider if I was too heavy for the ride when I realized that was crazy! I weigh a very normal amount now. It was a weird realization.

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Toward the end of the day, Little Man was hot and tired and asked if I’d ride the ferris wheel with him to “have some peace and quiet for a bit.” It gave me a nice view of the park!

On our way home, we stopped in PA to take my grandmother out to dinner. It never ceases to amaze me how well my son gets along with her. They genuinely have fun together – I guess 7 and 87 are compatible ages! The dog tagged along for the whole trip, and seemed to enjoy it. He normally freaks about car rides, but we put his bed in the back seat this time, and he was much calmer!

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Don’t let his calmness in this picture fool you – he’s crazy!

The only adventure left for this summer is our camping trip next week. That shouldn’t be too bad, so I’m really hoping to get back to consistently staying on-track now. I’m ready to see the scale changing again (in the downward direction, of course)!

Day 368 – Travel under control

I have felt REALLY good about my eating for the past week! I’ve been happy with my choices, and it makes me feel better about myself in so many ways. I’m not willing to veer from my very happy path, so I’m trying not to view our current vacation as a vacation from healthy eating. Luckily, we’re visiting friends who really enjoy healthy food, so they’ve already planned meals like grilled salmon with a pasta and veggie salad (which was AWESOME!).

Day 367

I’ve been feeling so much better since I got my eating back under control this week. I’m in a better mood, and I have more energy!

I’ve gotten back to a more regular running schedule, too. My knee seems to be tolerating it pretty well, and while I can tell that I’ve lost some of my fitness in the last couple weeks, I have a plan to end up reasonably prepared for my half marathon. I’m trying to rebuild slowly, so as not to infuriate my knee again. I did 1 mile on Monday, 2 miles on Wednesday, 3 on Thursday, and 3.6 this morning (I planning on doing 4, but it started to storm). We’re going to Cedar Point Amusement Park tomorrow; then I’ll try 6-7 miles on Sunday and rest on Monday.

Today, I also got an email from MapMyFitness that really shocked me! I know it’s connected to both my Garmin and the old C25K app I used to start running last year, so it has ALL of my running records. I didn’t realize just what that would add up to, though.

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I would not have guessed that I’ve run 521 miles and burned more than 50,000 calories! It’s hard for me to even wrap my mind around that!

I weighed in before we left town, yesterday. I only lost 0.3 lbs this week, but with how far off track I was at the start of the week, I’m ok with it. I keep telling myself that the scale will go down more next week, if I keep making healthy choices through this trip!

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I’m really tired of being stuck between 157 & 160. I’m proud of myself for maintaining my weight this summer (If I hadn’t been paying attention, I’m sure I would have gained!), but I’m ready to get back to seeing the scale go down.

Day 366 – My 1st FITaversary!

Today is a big day! It has been one year since I started this journey toward a healthier me! It kind of feels like a birthday, and I totally get why people celebrate “fitaversaries.” I’ve spent the last couple days thinking about everything from the past year, and I realized there is a LOT of it!

The Highlights:

  1. I can cross my legs at the knees now!
  2. My towel wraps all the way around me!
  3. I never “give up!” I have bad days; I eat things I regret; I enjoy treats; I celebrate holidays; and I go on vacation. But I track it ALL, and when I’m done, I reign it in and get back on track.
  4. I can run! When I started, 60 seconds felt like I was dying – Now, my longest distance is 10 miles!
  5. I eat breakfast every day! I love my cold oats and look forward to them every morning.
  6. I’ve gone from a size 18-20 down to a size 10.
  7. I have BONES! I used to feel like the Stay Puff Marshmallow man – now I can see and feel hip bones, shoulder bones, and my collar bone! My knee caps are still in hiding, but I’ll find them eventually.
  8. I love to roller blade! I’ve taken my son to the rink to skate a few times this summer, and he’s getting good at it, too. It’s awesome to enjoy physically active outings with my family.

The Unexpected:

  1. I’m still me. I don’t actually feel any different – now it’s just easier to move.
  2. Sometimes people treat me differently. A parent who used to blow me off (almost to the point of rude) now invites me to “hang out” with her.
  3. It’s still hard sometimes. I don’t know why I didn’t expect this, but I didn’t. Some part of me thought that somewhere along the way it would get easy – haha. Nope. I’ve learned to think of obesity as a chronic disease. I’ll never be “cured,” but I can keep it in check through diet and exercise – just like 9 billion other chronic diseases.

The Difference:365 day comparison

It’s hard to believe it’s been a whole year! I celebrated by getting a hair cut and taking Little Man skating. Tomorrow we leave for Ohio and then Pittsburgh, so my posts may be a bit sporadic for the next few days. Day 365Day 366

My eating has been good the last 2 days, and I feel so much better for it! It amazes me how much eating well make me feel good eating poorly leaves me feeling crappy.

Day 364 – Updated pics

I’ve got 2 days being solidly on-track, now. My husband’s been gone for a conference, so it’s just been myself and Little Man. It means I did a mile on the treadmill this morning instead of outside, but I’ve also been able to get a really nice routine going. I know I’ll be able to keep it up through Tuesday and Wednesday, but then we leave for Ohio on Thursday. I’ll probably be ok then, but Friday-Monday…well…I may end up calling this the summer of maintenance.

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I also took some new pictures today! Of course, I couldn’t find my black tank top, so I wore my gray one. It doesn’t show up as well in the pics. I’m also wearing shorts this time, because you know, it’s 90 degrees out!

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Maybe I’ll retake these pics. We’ll see. I do like the reminder that the first 3 pictures I wore a size 18, the next picture is a 16, the 3 after that are a 12, and those shorts are a size 10!

 

 

Day 362 – Weigh in and DC

46 Scale July 15 158.5 lbs

I have no idea why this is sideways. Maybe someday I’ll learn how to rotate it, but for now, I’m just standing my computer on its side. Depending on how you look at this, I’m down 0.9 lbs from last week or up 0.8 lbs from my lowest weigh-in back in June. Basically, I’m just maintaining between 157 & 160 at this point.

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DC was fun. We saw the Washington Monument and Lincoln Memorial to satisfy Little Man (who knew a 7 year-old would be so interested in a couple monuments?). Then we went to the American History Museum, because their Spark Lab is a GREAT kids area (and I love the 1st ladies’ dresses). We ended the day with a show at the planetarium in the Air and Space Museum. All-in-all it was a great day!

Day 362

My summer struggle continues. One planned indulgence leads to several days off the wagon, and for every pound I lose, I gain one back. I haven’t even been running much recently, since my knee has been bothering me. I wish I could figure out why this has felt so hard recently. I really miss feeling good about keeping a great routine with my eating and running, but then maybe that’s the root of my issues – summer is the opposite of routine. Every time I bring things under control and start to feel good, it’s time for vacation, 4th of July, a day trip, camping, etc.

Day 360 – Do not panic

My husband mentors a kid (middle school) in our community. Tomorrow, we’re taking him with us on a day trip to DC. Since we’ll be leaving at dawn (literally!), we invited him to spend the night at our house tonight. He gets along with our son really well, and both boys are VERY excited about their “sleepover.” We decided to make it extra special by ordering pizza and making ice cream sundaes. This has been planned for over a week, so I’m okay with the choices I’m making. I’m even posting this before I actually eat dinner, but I know that this is what I’ll eat. Tomorrow will be another high calorie day, as we eat out for lunch and dinner. I’m going to try and reign it in tomorrow, plus we’ll be spending the whole day walking around. I figure tomorrow will be a bit more balanced, though I’m sure I’ll still go over.

Day 360

Yep, this is for real. It’s intentional, planned, and I’m okay with it.

Day 358 – Takin’ it easy

I did half of my strength training this morning. Then I quit because I was just not feeling it. Sometimes, I feel bad about not completing my scheduled work out, but I’m learning that sometimes I need to trust myself. Sometimes I don’t want to do something because I’m feeling tired and whiny, but sometimes it’s because my body needs a break. I’m not sure how to tell the difference, yet. For now, I’m erring on the side of caution… and laziness.

Day 358

I’m okay with my eating today. I made healthy choices that I’m happy with. I ate when I was hungry and stopped when I was done.

Day 367 – Choices

Oh. My. Goodness. I want to eat tonight. I want to nosh and chow and devour and indulge. There is no real reason for this desire. I think it’s mostly just habit. I’ve been eating more food and more frequently and more junk this past month; and that’s tough to stop. That leaves me with a simple choice today – I can take the easy way out and eat. I can probably do it in moderation so that I don’t gain much weight, but ultimately, I know where that road leads and the scale would have no hesitation popping right back up to 230. My other choice is to grit my teeth and tough it out. I’m not actually hungry; I’ve eaten a very well-balance 1350 calories today including my morning oats, a sweet potato with 1/2 Tablespoon butter and brown sugar, a homemade chicken salad sandwich with cucumber, ravioli, and a banana. I’m not craving anything specific, probably because I’ve eaten a complete and well-balance diet today. I’m not emotional about anything, nor am I bored. I’ve been carrying my bottle of water around all day, so I’m not thirsty. I really think that overeating has just started to become a habit again. I started to go through the process of breaking this habit last week, but then I indulged Friday and Saturday. I’m okay with that, but I really need, and want, to get my eating most of the way back on track. I’m not willing to deny myself the occasional treat, but it should be occasional – not habitual. For now, that means I have to suck it up and not eat anything else.

This is one of the toughest things for me. I like to eat what I want, when I want, and I don’t deal well with denying myself. That said, I know that eating anything else right now will make me feel like crap. Since I’m not actually hunger, continuing to eat will make my belly hurt. That’s on top of the emotional pain I’ll suffer in the form of regret for eating food I don’t actually need or honestly even want. I’m sitting here writing this to remind myself that I don’t actually want to eat anything else. I know that making this tough choice now will make me feel great later. I’ll wake up tomorrow morning and feel proud of myself. I’ll be physically comfortable as I lay down to sleep tonight.

Day 357

I roller bladed a bit while Little Man rode his bike around the school parking lot this afternoon. My knee is belatedly angry about yesterday’s 10 miles, and skating seems to help it loosen up.

I’m supposed to do 4 miles tomorrow, but with the way my knee is feeling, I think I’ll do my strength training (that I skipped in favor of roller blading today).

Day 356 – 10 miles!

I was scheduled to run 10 miles on June 19, but my knee was hurting. 10 miles turned into 3.1 followed by a grueling 3.1 mile walk back to the car and 4 days of rest. Roller blading caused it to “pop” several times, and it magically felt a million times better. I started strength training to better support it and have been getting back to the running. Today, I decided it was time to try for 10 miles again.

I did it!!

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Check out my 10:43 pace!! I felt great today!

This came with such a great runner’s high! I got out early to run my “local” (45 min away) rail trail. Shortly after 9 am, I found myself feeling strong, powerful, accomplished, and generally awesome. As I sat down to stretch a bit before driving home, I had one of those really emotional post-run moments when I felt overwhelming appreciation for…well…everything.

I love the views from the trail head. I can’t help but feel like a very small part of something so much bigger when I look out and see the mountains.

My eating has been totally on track today – of course, since I’m burned over 1200 calories running, I can’t imagine over-eating 😉

Day 356

Hopefully, this will be the first of a whole streak of green days!